Stretch Marks

How to Stretch Your Ears
My ears are gauged, as are the ears of a large portion of the college generation. The process of gauging is different for everyone. And, when putting in healing factors and the individuals skin elasticity the progress of stretching one's ears can vary. However, the main rule that covers each individuals process is to take as much time as needed.
 I believe everyone will agree with me on stating that the first step is to pierce your ears. There's not much point in attempting to stretch something that isn't there. Although, I'm not here to judge so by all means try it if you think you've got a shot. There are many different places to get peirced such as Wal-Mart, Claire's, and your local body peircing shop. The first two are more likely to use a "gun" that launches a sharp stud through the lobe of your ear at an intense speed. The latter may simply shove a long sharp needle through your ear with their bare hands. Not really my cup o' tea, but to each pain fetish freak, their own.
 Once your ears have been run through like a practice dummy at a jousting range, the healing process begins. Listen to your torturer! Clean your ears. This point cannot be stressed enough. All throughout the process you should always clean your ears. Infection is a nasty bitch, so don't let her get you. The healing should last a few weeks to a couple months depending on the person, at which point you can start the stretching. And keep that in mind, once the ear is healed you can start stretching. This is true for the entire stretching process as well.
 The first few times it's surprisingly simple to go up a gauge. When I started I moved up two gauges at a time. But, be sure to know your gauge. If you're at an 18g and you try to shove in a 10g you'll probably cause some tearing and, more often then not, bleeding. When gauging up if you notice resistance, especially in the early stages (18g to 12g), use lotion. It's wierd and you'll have to CLEAN YOUR EARS afterward, but it helps keep the pain level to a minimum. Also, you can put in new stretchers while showering. The warm water relaxes your skin enough to make the process less painful.
 Stretchers are going to be a big part of your life from this point on. Stretchers look like long pointy nails without a head. The point of these is to ease the ear into an elongated shape without ripping the lobe to shreds. Ease them in until you feel they cannot go any further and then leave it be. Depending on the size you are attempting this could take a few days just to get the stretcher all the way in. Don't push it, take the time needed, and clean regularly.
 When one starts getting up in the gauges to the point where it's a visibly thick stud, one should stop using acrylic to gauge. In fact, never do it. The best stretchers to use are glass and metal. It helps keep your skin from attatching to it as it heals and they're easier to clean. At about 8g and up you'll probably start to notice that your ear "scabs" up around the piercing. This is normal, your skin sheds and creates new skin all the time. The build up is new skin healing at a new shape. Just keep cleaning your ears, don't pick your scabs, and make sure it doesn't get infected. Also you may want to slow down the stretching. Stretching is a long drawn out process that could take years depending on how big you gauge them.
 At a certain point, stretchers just wont do. It is at this stage that most people begin to tape their ears. This process involves getting teflon tape, wrapping the gauge a few times, lubing it up, and putting it back in your ear. This method has a faster healing time and is usually less painful or stressful on the ears. But again, don't jump ahead too far, serious damage can be caused. At this point there's really no other way to get the gauge bigger, so you've possibly reached your goal or plan to keep going. Just remember to take your time and as always, clean your ears.



How Skin Stretches
 Studies show that the elasticity of an individuals skin is a genetic predisposition. There are two layers to skin, the epidermis and the dermis. The epidermis is the top layer of skin which contains pigment, proteins, and is responsible for the generation of new skin cells. The dermis is the layer of skin that contains blood vessels, hair follicles, and collagen.Collagen produced in the dermis gives the skin it's elasticity. From birth to death the skin is constantly producing new skin cells.
 As the body-or parts of the body-grows new skin cells are produced. The skin cells pushed toward the surface are moved sideways to slowly repair any damage. It eases the strain caused from muscle, fat, or bone growth on the existing skin.This works as well with piercings, other self inflicted changes to the skin, or cuts. The new cells rise to the surface and fix the damage done to the old cells while moving sideways. It is for this reason that people are able to stretch ear lobes, lip piercings, and receive implants without serious "injury" to their skin.

Road Trip 2009: Revenge of the Road

Censor everything!

We are censored-all of us. There is not one person in this country that has undiluted access to everything. And as a whole, the world has become mostly complacent with that fact. The ones who push the boundaries of censorship are most frequently artists. It's not always serious artists, who may remain unbathed for weeks and create crude sexual sculptures with their toenail clippings. Sometimes it's a couple of guys looking to poke fun at everyone.

Since when is this fair? Television was made for upstanding citizens to sit back and watch other upstanding citizens solve mediocre problems. Americans don't need to watch a woman get punched in the face by a drunk frat guy at a bar. If that were true MTV's Jersey Shore would have been allowed to put the "fist-to-face connection" on air for all to see. Little Susie May and Joe Jr. probably get enough of that action at home watching their soon-to-divorce parents slug it out over the dinner table. Which is the way God intended them to view true love.

Whomever is calling the black bar shots is doing a well enough job, but more is always better. Just ask the growing population of alcoholics and drug addicts. Near the end of a South Park episode, in which the prophet Muhammad "appeared", all crude and insulting words and images were blacked and beeped out. Huzah! That show asks way too many questions, and proves one too many points to be allowed on the air. The Muhammad episode was, without a doubt, their best episode. And who called for this action? A group of extremist muslims with a square head on their shoulders.

That's right! It took some seriously well thought out threatening to get the censor ball rolling. Maybe the wrong people are doing the censoring these days. Keep it up extremists, without your well balanced minds the censors might let the reigns loose on these wild thinkers. Watch out America, there's a new sherrif in town with the backbone to bleep you good.